While researching the best ways to get people to swear allegiance to me and give up their own ambitions in order to achieve my goals I ran across an post on my former enemy's blog about how, if I truly despise evil office products, I should be doing more to crush the New Company and my former employer, the Parent Corporation.
I want to make it very clear: I despise evil office products and will never use them again, nor will I support their design, manufacture, distribution, or use among the general population. My comments in previous posts were not meant to indicate that I had relapsed into approving of them, but to illustrate my point that it is much more difficult than I had thought to get people to unite behind me when their judgment is not impaired by dependence on these tools of evil. It took me a while to come to this realization, but now that I have accepted it and changed my tactics I am once again having great success.
There has also been one incident at one of my field offices where a naive campaign worker used hole punches while distributing campaign literature, but she has been reprimanded and now my wife and I are training our new recruits on the dangers of brads and hole punches, how to recognize evil stickers, and how to talk to people who don't think there is anything wrong with evil office products. We are also getting ready to launch campaigns against the New Company and its evil designs. Just because I haven't have the manpower to launch attacks against them doesn't mean I won't be doing so in the very near future!
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